What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Weebles wobble, but paralyzed kids fall down.

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You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

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Double-whammy

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Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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You: Hey, I have a good knock knock joke, here, you start! -and if all goes well...- Them: Knock knock! You:Who's there? Them: Uhh...

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You know why they call me Scuba Steve? Because I Scuba Dive.

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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