A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do alcoholics use brown bags? Because they are ashamed of what they have become and seek to repress their guilt by entering into denial.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

joe galasso from plainview ny

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What has two legs? Half a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Where would you find 10 dead babies buried next to each other? In a cemetary.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops