Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

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Knock Knock Who's there? Police officer Police officer who? Police officer your whole family died in a car wreck last night.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Jay Z: a guy eats a gluten free pickle flavored cupcake, what happened? Will ferell: no one knows what it means! It's provocative!!

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Soccer...

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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What happens when you throw a yellow rock into a purple river? it makes a splash

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

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How do you make a baby stop screaming? Pour acid down its throat.

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

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How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

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What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why did the girl eat a sandwich? because she was thirsty

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops