Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

Q. What did the blond say when she woke up? A. I don"t know. I wasn't there.

What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

your skull would make a nice pen holder

A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

What's the difference between a duck?

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

All of these jokes are about white people

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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