why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

Today, my house burned to the ground. FML.

what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

Knock knock? Who's there? Interupting Doctor? Interupting Doc... You have cancer

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

Why did the car's airbag go off? He hit a boy eating his ice cream

How many Women's Rights activists does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything.

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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