How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

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Q. What happened to the women who cut her finger? A. she got staff infection and died.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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"Mommy! Look, I found a turtle!" "that's no turtle." "Oh..."

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

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FREE SEX! Now that I have your attention.............

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? ... A boy played in mud.

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How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a brand new Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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