A man walks into a bar and sees a large jar filled to the brim with $20 bills. He asks the bartender why there is so much money in the jar, and the bartender tells him that he has a horse in the back of the building, and he has a bet that if someone puts $20 in the jar and can make the horse laugh, then they will win all the money. The man, feeling confident, puts his money into the jar and tries to make the horse laugh. It is a horse, so of course he cannot make it laugh. He leaves, dejectedly, having just wasted 20 of his hard earned dollers.

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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What's worse than 9/11? FaZe Banks' upload times

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Na na na na na Neo! Na na na na na na 'Sporin!

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Whats eight feet tall, purple, smooth, delicious, uses proper grammar, and likes dolphins. I don't know.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible because orange's can't talk. Oh. It's Jim, I need to borrow your lawnmower.

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Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

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A Duck walks into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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