An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Get up Look in the mirror

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Roses are Red Violets are Red Grass is Red Trees are Red My yard is on fire.

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when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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A coyote walks into a bar, because human development has rapidly destroyed his natural habitat. He mauls three patrons.

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Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

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wwwwwhhhurjfjfiudkdhdhkrjfhfjhptghxusudgfhfdhydsyartsdyufhftsysduifogfiiffiydyycufkdytgysyseyydyyduudduydfefikdkeejdicttsysieoowowugagshxjkcjdjevwgyeixodlbbsgwdfehidigofojrehnfkcocoeppwiwufvvdjxifooejehedicisgeneifofjrjhehdhxirjvhejfjhrbrhjfbducjebkwpqosbhdhsvddhehueuwowpqpfugtbcihebdhdjgeyqiichhesweysyhy vhhhhhshdjfjhehehehehehuijrhfeds???????????????????????????????)GHJDJDJFKHRHDJDIEHDJKCHEEJFcyfjfjudffyewdjhsafvd

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Why is OK SUK WHANG's name on a gravestone? She thought she was way better than okay.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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Adam Fantuzzi's just jealous because he'll never be the man his mother is

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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What did the cat say to the cat? Miau

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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