Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

Why shouldn't you download music? Various reasons.

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

What city likes baseball the most? New York

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he wanted to impress his wife.

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

What do homeless people get at Christmas? Cold.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

I don't get it

haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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