A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

I used to be an adventurer, but then I decided to retire.

What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

So, would you like provolone or mozzarella with that? Yes.

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

A guy thought it could be funny to write a joke that is not and post it on a social network. And did it

A muslim paints Mohammed

A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

whats funnier than a dead baby? many things. a dead baby is a very sad and tragic thing.

Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

how many weasels does it take to change a lightbulb 0 weasels are animals and therefore are not capable of changing lightbulbs

Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

ring around the rosie ... your dead

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

How do you get a cow off a swing? Hit it with an axe.

Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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