Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why Did the throw up He was sick

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken go to KFC? Because it was suicidal.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What did the snoop dog have for breakfast? Weed

thumb_up thumb_down -25

2 big black men walked up to me with baseball bats. they politely asked me if i wanted to join their friendly game of baseball

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the kid get beaten up? -he was gay

thumb_up thumb_down -25

while having sex, the boy asked, "how many ears do elephants have?" his father answered, "two"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you scare a black man? You dont

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

kieran is a homosexual

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Through forceful action.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a black person that flies a plane? A pilot you racist BITCH! Its ok a niggah gots altititude.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops