What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

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Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human. Actually a perfect circle doesn't exist.

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Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

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what do you call a black chef glendon

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Did you hear the one about the nascar driver who couldn't pass his road test? No. It's true, he couldn't pass his road test.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Why did the women sleep in the kitchen. Due to the poverty levels of her area of residence, sub-sahara Africa, she, her 7 children and 3 orphaned nephews lived in one ram shackled room with a corrugated iron roof which served as a multi-purpose kitchen, bedroom, lounge and greeting area.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a gardener

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops