What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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A duck walks into a bar. Then he walks out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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jack and jill went up the hill to fetch some water , jill ended up bending over and jack ended up touching a blue waffle

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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What's better than your mom dying? Chocolate Cake.

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What would Chuck Norris do if you insulted him? Nothing. He probably doesn't have time for such foolishness.

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You can lead a horse to water, and you can pick your friends, but you can't sneeze with your eyes open.

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A girl and her family were walking by a cliff. Suddenly - due to a a part of the cliff falling away - her family fell over the edge and died. The girl ran to the bottom of the cliff and saw her family's body's strewn across the rocks, blood everywhere. She didn't have a phone on her and so could not call the police. She called over a man she saw in the distance. He asked "What's happened?". Just managing to stammer the words through her tears she said "My entire family fell off a cliff and died". The man unzipped his trousers and said "This really isn't your day is it love?"

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lol i'm going to hell for laughing at this shit

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Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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Why did the Iraqi airline crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

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Why did the person get hit by a fridge? They didn't for its physically impossible for most people to throw a normal sized refrigerator.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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