If Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee got in a fight, who would win? Chuck Norris, since Bruce Lee is dead.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Q: Why didn't Jack go up the hill? A: He had prior engagements.

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Hello, this is Chuck Norris speaking.

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your mammas so fat tha-- my mother is dead. oh... sorry.

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A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says that there are no dogs allowed, but the man says that he is blind. So the man sits down with his dog and asks for a drink. The bartender decided to check to see if he was really blind, so he says, " Hey, do you know what time it is?" The blind man replies, "7 o'clock," The bartender says, "Ha! You said you were blind! Get out of..." but was interrupted by the man, who promptly said, "No, I'm deaf," and left.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

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There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

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I have cancer. And you're next.

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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A penis walks into a bar..

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Why did the retarded man fail his math test? He didn't study.

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Q:Wy could't lily sleep at night? A: Becasue her eays were stappeld open.

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Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor! why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. why did the farmer cross the road? To get his chicken. Why didnt the farmer make it to the other side? He was hit by his tractor.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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