Roses are c0ck violets are vag this joke is for george i like it like that<3xxxx

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oh hey.

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How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

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What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7 ? : Because 7 8 9

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How many TV shows are there? A lot.

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. It is an avian species incapable of throwing such a heavy material as wood.

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Q. What do mummies do when they run out of toilet paper? A. Nothing - they're dead and inanimate.

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How do you hit a clown off a swing? There are many was of acting upon this situation but the most successful approach would be hitting the clown with a heavy object,

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

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A black guy walks into a shop, takes a shirt, and then he pays for it.

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What do an elephant, and a banana have in common? Neither one is an ambulance.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A cricket walks into a bar and the bartender says,"Hey, we have a drink named after you!' and the cricket says,"Oh really? You have a drink named Joe?"

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Ask me what my name is. What's your name. My name is Jeff.

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that krista chich from the below joke accepted me as a friend, then she blocked me. haha WOW, she realy is a bitch.

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What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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