Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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BIG MAC'S

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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roses are red, violets are blue. you've got Alzheimer's, it sucks to be you

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Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

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Anybody else hate when people mispell words in jokes It ruins the joke Most them prob some scumbags Probs to Jeffrey K April 12, 2013 1:55 PM

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

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Click here for free sandwich.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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Why did andy fall down Because his friend pushed him over

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What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

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Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

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What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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