Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, violets are blue, they really should be purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

knock knock whos there? jew jew who ? jew son o a b**** ? (aimed at ight wing racist jews)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How does it change many dyslexics to take a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down +12

whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a pool full of black people? a pool full of black people.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man walks into a bar, sits down and talks to the woman sitting next to him. The woman took out a cigarette, and offered one to the man. The man said yes, even though he never smoked before, because he was trying to get with the woman. They smoked a few more before the woman left, and the man left shortly after. The man became a chain smoker and died 1 year later from lung cancer caused by smoking multiple packs a day.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks the horse, "Why the long face?". The horse didn't understand English, so he took a shit on the floor, and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is a light shade of beige? My bedroom wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops