What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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You want to hear a joke? Republican

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What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

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The doctor woke up and the hooker he screwed told him she had the clap and he said thats the least of your problms bitch you have aids

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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Yo momma's so fat that she's gotta get a special door that will allow her to get through.

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

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What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

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Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

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why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

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Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

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A: Knock Knock B: 7

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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What did the boy ask the ice cream man? Can I have some ice cream?

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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