Roses are red violets are blue I'm black give me money

What did the pencil say to the other pencil? Nothing, pencils do not have the ability to speak as they are an object.

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

A: Knock Knock B: 7

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

knock knock who's there? The police your family is dead

why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

What did the computer say to his girlfriend? I'm going to RAM you tonight.

i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

Cool I just got a free Minecraft gift code at http://freeminecraftgiftcode.net

What did the boy ask the ice cream man? Can I have some ice cream?

What's one plus one? two.

Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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