You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

A: Knock Knock B: 7

your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

What ryhmes with turtle rape

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

What's worse then an adult dying A baby dying

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

A girl hands her boyfriend her phone and says it's his dad. He throws it on the ground exclaiming, "My dad's not a phone, duh!"

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

Why does Renee suck at tetris Because she has cancer.

How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not a blind guy.

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

Heskey time.

yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

Robin, get in the car!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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