What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

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I got a boner from the waitress touching my shoulder, please dislike this

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If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

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What does Mitt Romney approve of flip flops? They feel good on his feet.

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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Why is red? He was just murmured by a phycopath.

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Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

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How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

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Remember when Jesse Ziegenbein was skinny? yeah niether do I

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

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So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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