What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

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Emily Walker.

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Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

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what do you get when you cross ruddell with a chicken? still a prick

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What do you call a person who hammers a nail into his forehead? A dumbass.

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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A blonde is walking down the road, and she sees a sign saying STOP. She carries on walking. As a pedestrian, the sign does not apply to her.

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A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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roses are red violets are blue im in class i shouldnt be on this

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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