knock knock who's there who who who and if u sat something about an owl I'll kick u in the face u fat cike

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Such a statement assumes that life is an actual person, which is impossible. Thus, you do not need to concern yourself with what you must do when life hands you lemons.

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Why didn't susie use the jump rope She had no arms, replied carl No, susie doesn't like using jump ropes replies the mother

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, this is stupid, Violets are purple Violets are purple Oranges are orange Nothin' rhymes with orange wait.... DOORHINGE!!!!! -sincerely, That famous Orange on YouTube

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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when i yell your name i probably want your attention :) S.H.

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Why was Jesus Christ white? Because it would be a lot better if I had more confidence in myself...

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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What do you call a bunch of whiteguys running down a hill? An Avalanche What do you call a bunch of black guys running down a hill? A Mudslide What do you call a bunch of mexicans running down a hill? A Jailbreak

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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Why didn't the boy blow out his birthday cake this year? He died last year.

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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