What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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Q-What was Hitlers favorite hobby to proceed in when he was sad? A- Manipulating populations and raping,torturing and mutilating the Jewish population.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is concerned about his fitness and decided to walk to work instead of drive.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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My Jimmy Saville advent calendar is rubbish. It only opens from 1 to 16.

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Why did santa cross the road? He didn't he is not real.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Two black guys walk into a bar the bartender says get out

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Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Why did the duck turn black? an oil spill

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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