- I was at my house last night - I was at your MOM'S house last night... I'm her neighbor, she was having trouble with her plumbing and I thought i should help out

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A man said to a performer performin in a concert,"Go break a leg!". The performer did not respond because he is perfoming.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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If I had a nickel for everyday I lived...... I would get a nickel a day

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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Kevin+Sean sitting in a tree enjoying mcdonald's free wifi.

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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Whats green and has wheels? A green car.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 because seven is black

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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Who invented apple? God

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops