Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats the difference between a pizza and your opinion? I asked for the pizza

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

a guy named bob likes sprinkles on his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

8================D-------- (.Y.)

thumb_up thumb_down -15

how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

why do they sparkle?!?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Penguin Waddles into Abercrombie and Fitch.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The WPGA tour

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her she is a burnette.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses the best ingredients.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man walked into a bar. That hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops