Your mother is so obese, that when shot with a high velocity round from a handgun, the bullet is unlikely to penetrate the several layers of fat protecting her vital organs, like a fleshy kevlar vest. However, she is likely to die from infection, which is highly commom among gunshot wounds.

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hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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Why did the black women sing to the left to the left? Answer: because black people have no rights

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Q: What's the best way to satisfy your hunger A: Eat

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Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

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A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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Want to hear a joke You're Adopted

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So there were these two ovens in a muffin. One oven said "Holy fuck it's muffiny in here." The other oven said "Holy fuck a talking oven!"

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your so fat. your fat!

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What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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Q: Why did the officer stop the black SUV? A: Because it was going way over the speed limit.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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