what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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Ben: do you want to hear a joke. jack: yh go on then, i bet its funny. Ben: Your future.

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What did john say to bob Hey bob

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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Hillo, its Spodermen, teiling u i fuked ur bich.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Neither have I, nobody knew him.

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What did the monkey say to the other monkey Monkey can't talk

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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