why did the man get a divorce? Because his wife had an affair.

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What did the farmer that lost his tractor say? Wheres my tractor?

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

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Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Roses are red, violets are blue No they're not, violets are violet

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What did God tell Moses to deliver to the Hebrews? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

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Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

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Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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