A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" Turns out a man suffering from schizophrenia believes he is a bartender for animals as his health slowly declines as his family comes to visit him every day.

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What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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What is worse than the holocaust paying taxes

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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Q: What did the cop do when he saw a mexican in his car? A: Nothing, he was looking in a mirror.

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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