what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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What did the runner say after he ran 10 miles? I just ran 10 miles.

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one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

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What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

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Fox News

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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I have a very serious problem with my narcolepsy. I occasionalolahdf;honainbirgnipqgierngiaqbhgpqruiph

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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What happened to the black guy who got pulled over by the cops? He was told that his left tail light was out

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

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What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

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Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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