i punched my mother in the face once she cried

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

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Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

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Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

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whats the difference between ebola and a can of dead babies? i have ebola. this isnt funny at all.

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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besides saying "Oh, Yeah" and punching down walls, what does the kool-aid man do? drink cool aid

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What's worse than a joke An ANTIJOKE!

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Asian women drivers...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Why did the woman eat her sandwich. She was hungry.

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Where did Sudie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

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What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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what does the monster eat after going to the dentist? the dentist

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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