There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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Why was the ginger crying? Because they used him as the fire hydrant.

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? eating the worm causing it to breed inside of your body later causing them to eat you internally

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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whats up and also down? your mum

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Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

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How do you fit 94 jews in a volkswagon? two in the front, three in the back, and 89 in the ash tray

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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What's worse than finding The Holocaust in your apple? Most things, because that's impossible.

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

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a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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