What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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what did the captcha say to the homo sapien? frTrewQui NiolismTU

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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Brett Favre sent me a pic of his penis. I then compared it to my own and felt good about my general ackage size

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Why was the Asian girl doing a math problem? It was her homework that her teacher assigned her class.

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

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A black man and a hispanic man are in a car. Who is driving? The guy who didn't call shotgun.

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Why was the Jewish man in jail? He lit a local CVS on fire.

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Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

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So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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Why is this site popular? Because people don't read the terms of service.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy so heres my number actually is dolan

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Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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An atheist was taking a walk through the woods, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!", he said to himself. As he was walking along the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. When he turned to see what the cause was, he saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charging right towards him. He ran as fast as he could. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing, He ran even faster, crying in fear. He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer. His heart was pounding and he tried to run even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up, but saw the bear right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him. At that moment, the Atheist cried out "Oh my God!...." Then the Atheist died a violent and terrible death.

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Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

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What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

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A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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