What did the panda say to the other panda? We are fuzzy Oreos

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why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

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how did the bus fall outa the tree it got hit by a hellicopter how did the boy fall outa the tree he was attached to the bus how did the chicken fall outa the tree it fell off the branch

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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Why did the cupcake walk into the bar? It can't it's a cupcake

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Why did the little boy cry? Because his parents were shot in the face while he was forced to watch you insensitive jerk Now walk away ????

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Three men walked into a bar. You'd think one of them would of ducked?

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whats worse than death getting your nuts ripped of by a rabid racoon

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Did you hear about the Australian man who was jumped by a gang of Americans with knifes? He had his cash and possessions stolen from him, and had to spend two weeks in hospital due to stab wounds.

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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Why did the black man get drenched by a fire hose because he was on fire

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I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Why didnt the poor black man have cell phone service? Because seven eight nine.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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Jesus walks on water Chuck Norris swims through land

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil armstrong Neil armstrong walks on the moon...Michael Jackson molests little boys

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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