What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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