So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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A man walks into a metal bar He had a swell time.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Downs Syndrome... and a ding-dong potato

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Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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A construction worker walks into a bar. Lucky he was wearing his hard hat.

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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Whats funny and has 2 wheels The holocaust, I lied about the wheels, and the funny

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

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Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

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How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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What's red & is bad for your face? A brick.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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Whose your daddy? Not me

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Chuck Norris got hit by a train. It was a very bloody and sad incident and he will be missed.

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Why was 2 afraid of three Because it bigger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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