What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

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What did one salt shaker say to the other salt shaker? Nothing, Salt shakers are merely used to add flavor to foods.

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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What do you call a moldy apple? ... A moldy apple.

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what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

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I'd tell you a joke about Uganda but it wouldn't be worth it as it probably would keep a low score and possibly even get deleted for staying a week with a negative rating, for a number of reasons including that it isn't particularly funny, it was copied from another website and it is slightly racist. Taking into account what most people look for in a joke, it doesn't necessarily meet their needs and would more than likely fall into a lame category. And for that reason I have not submitted it.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

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Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

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How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

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Why did the black man commit suicide? Because the white man murdered him.

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What word is always spelled wrongly? None of them. Every word has been spelled right at some point.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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Austin do your class work. Quit looking at anti-jokes. Yes you the one that goes to RRHS.

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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How are friends and trees alike? They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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