Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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Once a upon a time there was a boy whom likes cheese. The boy: I like Cheese and thats the end of the story

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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What's brown and smells like poo? Poo.

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

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How many stripes are there on a policeman's socks? None, policemen must wear regulation plain black socks.

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knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

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four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

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Pickles are powerful

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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