What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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how many babies can fit into a microwave i dont know i havent tried

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Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

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Pickles are powerful

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Nickelback.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was locked safely in the chicken coop.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

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Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

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what do women and men have in common? nothing, women are inferior

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What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops