A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

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whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

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Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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YOU

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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9/11

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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Yo momma is so poor when she went to the bank the teller was like " you have no money."

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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What happens when a gay guy and a hillbilly enter at the same bar togather? a police dog nation gards and a priest had to stop the abomination.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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what's black and can't swim?

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What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

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What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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