Your momma is so old, it is likely that she will pass away in the near future, and I would recommend you to spend some quality time with her.

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Why did the two blonds go to the bar together? Because they were carpooling to save money and help save the earths ozone layer that seals in all of our oxygen. They were also meeting some friends.

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A man walks into a bar, asks the bartender for a beer. Bartender says, "That'll be $3.50." Man says,"The joke maker did not explain monetary transactions."

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Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

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Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

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Why do black people eat watermelon? Because it taste good.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a beatiful parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?" The parrot was his fathers. Do to severe mental and physical illness, he can no longer take care of it. He asked his son to take it, those were his last words as he slipped into a coma

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One's fun to smash and the other is a watermelon.

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What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? When you think that there is no worm in your apple, but after your second bite you look down in disgust as you notice you have eaten half of the worm and see the other half wriggling about in your apple.

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How did Hellen Keller eat her meals? With a fork.

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What nickname do you give Harrison Kinney if he is good at remixing music? Harrison "Remix" Kinney

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What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

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why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

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What has 8 legs and 1 eye? 2 chairs and half a fish.

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Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

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What's purple and glows? An electric grape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops