Doctor: I'm sorry about your disease, young man. It looks like your time is up. Man: NO! How much time to I have? Doctor: Five. Man: Five years? Five months? Five weeks? Doctor: Four... Three...

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

Why did Gina laugh? Because something was funny.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

what would you get if you combined a sixth grader with a machine gun? A homophobe

What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

a man ran into a bar screaming. he now has a severe coma

So this guy was making a sandwich...

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

Erron who the hell are you? How many people are you going to use before you finish whatever the fuck is on your agenda?

how may horses can you fit in a blender i can't remember what is red and goes 100KPH a horse in a blender

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

What do you do when you find a black guy bleeding on your porch? You should call an ambulance! This man is hurt!

whatdumb and gay stewart price

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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