Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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a man was hired for a job. he made a lot of money and was able to support his family.

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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What's worse than the Holocaust? A Holocaust survivor. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

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What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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how do you burn a lot of calories? set a fat kid on fire

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A Jewish man, a christian man, and a buddist man walk in bar, They all have to much to drink and are arrested for driving under the influence while trying to get back home.

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops