Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

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Why was the girl running? She had to catch her bus.

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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what do kids take their lunch in to school. that depends if they buy lunch at school... otherwise they bring it in a lunchbox...

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Fat? Jesse Z

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q: Do you know what's the no.1 cause of pedophellia? A: Sexy kids

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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Jesse is so fat that Roy is jealous of his big ass tits

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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I am strangling you. Do you see my arms? I AM FREAKEN STRANGLING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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