What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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What's purple, blue, red, orange, yellow and green. A rainbow .

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How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

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mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Banana soup, Gorilla poop

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:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -Fish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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