Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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A homosexual walked into a bar. He orders a beer. When he holds out his credit card, the bartender says, "We do not accept credit." Upon hearing this, the homosexual reaches into his wallet and pulls out five dollars. Because it is legal tender, the bartender takes the money and gives the homosexual the change that is due. The homosexual proceeds to drink the beer. When he is finished, he walks out of the bar. Nobody is aware of his sexual orientation.

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Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

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One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

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a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

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What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

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- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

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Your dad got tired while running, so he stopped running.

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Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. Though if the ladder is rickety and she needs someone to steady it for her, two.

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What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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What did the man do to the begging orphan on a cold Christmas morning? He kicked him.

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What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

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What's orange and rhymes with a parrot. A carrot

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops