How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

whats up with that? i'm from jersy

Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

A man walked into a bar and a knife seventeen times.

When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

Stat1st1cs sh0w 0ne 1n f1ve pe0ple d0n't understand b1nary

A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

WILLY

Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

How does a yeti say hi? Raaawwwrrrr

Your mom is so fat that I worry she may develop diabetes.

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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