How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

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What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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What did the black basketball player say to the white basketball player when he lost? Good game.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

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Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

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Why couldn't the cat drink the milk? Because it had no face.

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Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

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WNBA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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