What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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so a jewish man walks into a bar. He looks at the bartender and says...this better be free

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Shltskc gw? G

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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