What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

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If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? I like guys... cause I'm gay.

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How many cavemen does it take to change a lightbulb? A caveman wouldn't know what to do with a lightbulb.

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A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

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man1:did you know hellen keller had a dog? man2: no man1: neither did she

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So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face! -Lets go Mets

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This will be the least popular anti-joke. Dislike this joke.

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what did old retarded autistic ginger kid get for his birthday? i dont know thats why i asked

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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What do you get when you come across a blonde. Depression, because you want to do her, but you know that will never happen cause you spend to much time sitting on your ass looking at anti-jokes.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

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The Minnesota Vikings won a game.

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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